Gentlemen, once you’ve read this post, I believe you’ll better understand the women in your life. And ladies, young to mature, please realize that you’re not alone. You have many sisters – some who want to encourage you. As your sister, I encourage you to welcome the next version of yourself and enjoy the next season of your life.
My age has never bothered me. I’ve usually felt really positive about turning another year older, but this birthday was looking very different. Life has been thumping and slamming me and sometimes I’m not feeling very zesty. As I approached 55, I also began noticing some physiological changes that weren’t thrilling me. I definitely wasn’t feeling positive about crossing over into my latter 50s.
Thankfully, this isn’t where my story ends. I began to examine my life. More importantly, I examined my attitudes about my life. I was on my evening bike ride and an interesting thought entered my mind. “Pray for a new perspective.” Alright, yes – a new perspective. I began to ask God for this. The next morning, the same thought entered my mind. Yes – “Lord, I need a new perspective – I need Your perspective.” Here’s what I’m seeing.
>I’d never believed that I was a noticeable woman, or that I added value to the lives of others. God began to show me a more complete image of myself. He used new situations and a clearer understanding of previous occurrences, to help me see myself differently. He has shown me that I do have value in this world, but that I cannot depend solely on humans for this – I must depend on Him. I’ve learned that when those closest to me, don’t seem to value me, my value still remains, because God is always the same.
>I’ve realized that I’ve been focusing on things that I don’t like about myself, instead of appreciating the things that I could like. Most women do this. I decided to take my new perspective on a trial run. I selected the gutsiest item of clothing that I could find – a silky, red, form-fitting, lowcut jumpsuit. I tried it on, and instead of using my critical eye, I purposely looked for things that I liked. When I chose to focus on my good attributes, I was BaBam! pleased with how I looked. I didn’t purchase the jumpsuit, but I did take photos. When I look at those photos, I easily slip into critical mode, finding the tiniest flaw – applying the new perspective is a process.
>I’ve stopped feeling guilty about taking the time to care for my physical needs. Proper nutrition, hydration, exercise, rest and beauty routines – it all goes a long way toward making me feel better about the woman that I’m becoming, and this helps me to have the energy and confidence necessary for reaching out to others.
> And I’ve saved the best for last. My MVP (most valuable perspective) is all about inner changes – I’ve been at work with God, and I’ve grown to desire obedience to Him like never before. I’m no longer afraid to ask God to search me for sin, because I desire more than anything else, to be in close fellowship with Him, and to be representative of His goodness. This used to be scary – I knew it would be hard-work, and that sometimes I’d have to give up what I want. God says “that serves no purpose in your life – time to grab My hand and trust Me, rely completely on Me – time to let go of that”. He enables me to make courageous decisions. His ways are always best. His timing is always perfect. And I respond with “thank you Lord, for what You are making me into – I’m Your workmanship and I praise You for it”.
Let’s keep trying to convince the women in our lives that they’re beautiful – inside and out. It might take some persistence – the self-critical voice in a woman’s mind is loud. Two last thoughts. Ladies, we’re not in competition with each other – lift other women up. Men, there’s nothing wrong you complimenting a woman, as long as you’re a gentleman, your motives are pure, and you’re respectful of your wife’s feelings. Is she funny? Is she wise? Does she welcome others into her life? Does she look put together? Does she smile a lot? Is she a caretaker of others? Is she thoughtful and kind? Does she have a fantastic figure or pretty features? Chances are, she needs to hear this – tell her.
I think that turning 55 isn’t going to be so bad after all – I’m excited to meet the next gen of myself and live life abundantly in this next season.
Thank you for taking the time to read this post. I absolutely love to see your feedback – I review every reaction, share and comment. You are such an encouragement to me!