Sugar and Spice and Everything Nice

One of the most noticeable differences between men and women is the way that we communicate. Today, I’m focusing on how women can communicate safety and security to their husbands.

Give him some time and room to relax. When your husband walks through the door, he is readjusting. He is coming home from his world where he has been fighting battles and now he must adjust to family life. He might be a little grumpy or distant and he might need some moments to downshift. Try to greet him with a smile, kiss and a hug. Don’t dump your day on him. Give him some time to readjust with a little peace and he will probably be able to invest in you later.

Don’t belittle him. If your husband opens up to you and shares a problem and the way that he would like to proceed, don’t start rattling off all of the reasons that you are concerned. Don’t belittle his ideas. Instead, reassure him that you recognize the difficulty in making the decision. My husband knows that I need a lot of information so at this point, he will answer my questions and usually, we will commit to pray. Your husband probably already knows that he is accountable for his decisions so it is not necessary to remind him of this.

Don’t cold shoulder him. Women are especially in tune with the needs of those around us. Most husbands are not. Don’t punish him with the “cold shoulder” because he did not live up to your expectations. Most men just absolutely cannot stand it when women do this. Stop playing games and just tell him what you need.

Don’t reject him. Don’t rebuff him or make him feel like a sex maniac when he shows his attraction for you. Men face a lot of temptations each and every day. Some men sink their sexual energy into pornography and other illicit sexual experiences. If he is interested in you, view it as a blessing.

Do you remember the old poem about what girls are made of? Try using a little sugar and spice and everything nice. As a gentle reminder, we can only control what we do in our relationships but even the smallest steps in the right direction can have monumental impact.

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