This post is dedicated to those that grieve, because your Dad is no longer here to celebrate this day with you. You would love to pick up the telephone and catch up with him, or go and sit beside him as he chills in his easy chair, but you cannot. He is gone, and it is not by your choice, that you can no longer spend Father’s Day with your earthly father.
I understand the void that you feel. 35 years ago, my Father took his own life. It was just 3 months to the day before my 18th birthday. He was only 42 years old and there was so much life to be lived. There was so much good to come, but he could not see that – his pain was too overwhelming to him. I miss my Dad but there is something else that I miss as well.
Since his death, I miss what my Dad has missed out on. He never met his son-in-law. He has missed watching his grandchildren grow up – every milestone and accomplishment, and he never got to see the woman that I have become. I could be sad, and sometimes I still grieve, but mostly I now choose to remember that he loved me and that he called me endearing names like “smiley” and he looked at me as though I was the best thing that he ever did with his life. Now, I realize that even though my Dad was with me for only a short time, he gave me so much. He taught me to feel deeply when I love and to think thoughtfully and God has not wasted my grief. The pain that so easily could have become bitterness has become compassion that has evolved into a deep longing to have others see the light of Christ in me – to glorify Him.
If you are missing your Father today, and wishing that he was here, try to remember that there is an abundance of the fatherless. If you have been blessed to have a father invest into your life, even if it was for a shorter time than you would have chosen, take that and use it to bless another life. You can continue your Dad’s legacy by pouring into someone else. Giving of ourselves takes our focus off of our own pain for a time and this will be deeply therapeutic for you and you will impact another life positively.
You can probably imagine that this was an extremely difficult post to write. I have bared my heart to you and my deepest hope is that somehow, in some way, someone will be helped. I want this to be a Happy Father’s Day for you. May you have many pleasant memories of your Dad this weekend, and every single day, and may your joy spill out onto others!
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