There’s this woman that we know. She’s rock candy. Solid and strong as a rock but sweet as candy. She appears to be self-assured. She is a ray of sunshine. From the outside, it looks like her entire life is peachy. She notices when others aren’t coming around and she checks up on them. She senses when others seem down or burdened and she offers help or encouragement. Others rely on her and she seems to have the time to come to their aid. Since she’s a rock, people assume that she has no emotional, physical or spiritual needs but I assure you, she is human too. She’s a flesh and blood woman with challenges, struggles, pain and heartaches. She doesn’t always have her life, emotions or health in order? Sometimes she feels like everything in her life is falling apart. Sometimes she feels like she is falling apart.
What makes her different? Why does she appear to have life under control? How does she have spare time and energy to reach out to others? It’s simple – she just makes a moment by moment choice to focus on working hard and conducting herself with excellence and integrity and she reaches outward to others in lieu of becoming overly self-focused. She is strong, caring and compassionate but her life is far from perfect. She has the same challenges in her faith and trust, marriage and children, job and home, health and beauty, as every other woman.
She is trusting, patient and forgiving but when she reaches her own personal limit of hurtful, disrespectful, rude or careless behavior from another human being, she will draw the line. Because of her authentic character, she won’t always merely distance herself. Her strength causes her to confront the situation but her kind nature causes her to choose her words very carefully. She will keep the majority of the details to herself, only telling the bare minimum of what she has experienced and she will trust that God will handle the rest. If this woman decides to confront, she has considered the circumstances carefully. A wise person will listen and consider what she has said for she has already proven her integrity. It is most likely the truth and even though there is much more to the story, out of politeness or consideration of the feelings or reputation of those who are involved, she won’t discuss it. Don’t talk behind her back or blame her for the wrongdoings of someone else and don’t try to influence others to think badly of her. All of this adds insult to her injury. Instead, remember how this woman gave generously and realize that she simply reached a point of self-preservation.
Lastly, realize that this woman needs care too. Ask her about her life. She’s not strong all of the time. Sometimes she is exhausted. Sometimes she is crippled by fear. Sometimes she is in physical or emotional pain. She gives her love freely but she still needs to receive love. She needs to know that others genuinely care about her too. She needs to know that she has positively impacted other lives.
Would you be the one who cares for her? Make today the day or let her wake up tomorrow with a message or phone call from you. Ask her how she slept, or how she’s feeling, or ask her about her life, or just let her know that you’ve been thinking about her. Let her know how she has impacted you. These might seem like small gestures, but her heart will soar all day long.